'Death Race 2000'

David Carradine stars in this suped up futuristic NASCAR race that is part Frogger and part 'Mad Max'. 'Death Race 2000' is a cult classic that was remade in 2008 by Paul W.S. Anderson and starred Jason Statham. This movie is as campy as movies can get and I pitched a tent several times during it. 'Death Race 2000' is set in the future when the country has gone under and even the president is scared to stay within it. It's here we get to take part in the Transcontinental Road Race, a murderous cross country race from New York to L.A. where anything and everything goes. The problem is, apparently the writers couldn't think of any possibilities whenever "Anything and Everything" could go down. Sly Stallone plays a character called Machine Gun Joe and his roadster has 2 big machine guns on the front of it, however, they might as well been hood ornaments because they never fired. Carridine plays Frankenstein, a character so bruised and battered that he must wear a mask to cover his hideous face. This movie came out 2 years before 'Star Wars' and I'm certain they stole the concept for Darth Vader from Paul Bartel's portayal of Frankenstein. In the film the racers get rewarded points based on how many people they run down in their cars. They have an outlandish scoring system that rewards them more for taking out the very young (toddler age) and the very old. This movie was very bad, but a film like this provides blueprints for up and coming directors so they can take an existing thought and fill in those blanks in such a way to truly enhance a story for a new generation. This movie reminded me alot of 'Rollerball' in the fact that both films have an amazing concept that just sparks the imagintion and then both had action packed remakes, but the originals were both lifeless and dull. Don't get fooled by this one. End result is 1 1/2 out of 5. 

'Mirrors'

You would think with such seasoned actors like Kiefer Sutherland ('A Time to Kill', 'The Lost Boys') and Paula Patton ('Deja Vu', 'Precious') that this movie might be able to live up to some sort of potential. Think again. 'Mirrors' is as cliche as they come. Even though the story and the element they use to try to terrify you is original (other than it being a Korean remake from 2003), the fact that they tried to turn something ordinary and plain into something horrifying is almost a joke. It has been done and redone so many times over the past few years that there are almost too many to count ('Pulse', 'One Missed Call'(Cell Phones), 'The Ring', 'White Noise'(TV), 'Feardotcom', 'Stay Alive'(Internet), 'Unborn'). And to top it all off, they throw in the atypical paranormal child that is creepy, but so familiar you would swear they live next door because you see them so much ('The Shining', 'The Sixth Sense', 'Stir Of Echoes', 'The Ring', 'Pet Sematary'). Amy Smart provides the audience with the one truly terrifying scene. You would think there would be more "shock and awe" moments considering Alexendre Aja was behind this reflective thriller (he was responsible for 2003's 'High Tension' and the remake of 'The Hills Have Eyes'). If you're looking for a cookie cutter thriller that has very minimal scares and the worse ending to a movie since Tim Burton's 'Planet of the Apes', then check this out. End result is 1 1/2 stars out of 5. 

'Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets'

This second installment of the 'Harry Potter' franchise has us back at Hogwarts as Harry starts his 2nd year. Chris Columbus comes back as director and takes the helm. Other than doing the first 'Harry Potter', Columbus is also known for directing 'Home Alone' and 'Mrs. Doubtfire' as well as writing movies like 'Gremlins' and 'The Goonies' too. The first movie was so family friendly and cuddly, there was nowhere to go but a little darker. Although this one was a little kiddy, it started the slow trail of darkness that eventually the other films took. I really enjoyed how "Sherlock Holmes" Harry and his friends felt during 'The Chamber of Secrets'. They seem to do more investigating in this one than most of the other ones combined. I also love to see the backstory of Potter unfold throughout these films. At the end of the day, now that all 8 of the films are out, I rank this one 7th among the series just for the simple fact that this film serves as a crossover from the kid friendly fun of the first and the serious struggle of death in the 3rd. I still enjoyed it immensely and 'The Chamber of Secrets' will continue to be a fun re-watch for years to come. End result is a 3 1/2 out of 5.

'Dinner for Schmucks'

'Dinner for Schmucks' is nonstop laughs. Unfortunately, most of the laughs within the movie are at the expense of these misunderstood characters. You can't help but smirk and chuckle, but everytime you do you feel like a bully in high school. This film is like a slow moving train wreck; you don't want to look, but you just can't help yourself. There are lots of films out there that are like this, most of them starring Ben Stiller. 'Schmucks' is a film where the main character is a good enough guy, but for some reason the director thought it would be funny to crap on him for an hour and a half. Films like 'There's Something About Mary', 'You, Me, and Dupree', 'Meet the Parents', 'Along Came Polly', and 'American Pie' all come to mind when I think about what Paul Rudd goes through in this movie. This film is actually a foreign remake from 1998 called 'The Dinner Game'. Jay Roach (director of the 'Austin Powers' franchise and 'Meet the Parents' movies) did an uncanny job in casting for this picture. I always say that Paul Rudd is better used as a supporting character, that he's not able to carry a story on his own. I still feel that way, but having a huge and supremely talented core of actors backing him up lifted his talents to new heights. For not being a fan of these "ruin the nice guy's life" movies, I still thought the performances by Rudd, Galifianakis, Carell, Clement, and Livingston was worth seeing Paul Rudd get pooped on by every big name in the business right now. End Result is a 3 out of 5. 

'Despicable Me'

Steve Carell proves that sometimes it's good to be bad. 'Despicable Me' stars Carell as a bad guy named Gru and his attempt to become the world's greatest super villian. This is yet another PG rated animated comedy that is truly entertaining for people of all ages. 'Despicable Me' follows in the footsteps of other recent films like 'Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs', 'Monsters vs. Aliens', and 'Up'. Carell also got to butt his comic genius against the likes of Jason Segel, Russell Brand, Will Arnett, and Jemaine Clement (who plays Jerry the Minion). The 3-D aspect was some of the best I've seen (it ranks right up there with 'Avatar' and 'A Christmas Carol'). The roller coaster seen in particular was breathtaking and showed us why 3-D is truly the future of cinema. I thought the story was a smash and the symmetry and metphors used were so smart and fresh coming from an animated story. I haven't seen so much thought and emotion put into a non-live action story since 'Finding Nemo'. I really think that hollywood has discovered an untapped resource with animated features and really ever since 'Toy Story', they have taken that extra step to make sure they live up to or surpass their live action counterparts. End result is 4 1/2 out of 5. 

'The Other Guys'

I believe that comedies, especially the spoofs and satires, have gone way down hill compared to the 'Airplane!' and Mel Brooks days ('Blazing Saddles', 'Spaceballs', 'Young Frankenstein'). I don't think the 'Scary Movie' franchise helped at all. Top all that off with the "Epic, Diaster, Date, Superhero, Meet the Spartans, Vampires Suck" movies that became unwatchable and embarrassing and you have the spoof movies of the last decade. Adam McKay took a stab at the buddy cop comedy and really made it work. 'The Other Guys' takes a good mix of action cop movies ('Bad Boys', 'Lethal Weapon') and crosses them with the spoof comedies of the 80's and 90's ('The Naked Gun' and 'Police Academy' series, 'Loaded Weapon') to immerge as this hilarious "Quote" machine that will be talked about for a long time. Will Ferrell and I have a love/hate relationship. I love it when he's in a role and he doesn't have to take the reigns and lead the whole time. He has been so much more successful being able to bounce off other actors ('Old School', 'Land of the Lost', 'The Other Guys') as opposed to having to be the only big laugh in a film ('Kicking and Screaming', 'Bewitched', 'Semi-Pro'). I think you will be surprised by who you end up laughing at in this film. McKay was able to pull together some really talented actors that you may not expect to be super funny and they really pulled it off. While 'The Other Guys' excells in laughs, it does lack a bit in story (you'll be laughing so hard sometimes you'll forget what the story even is). This is a fun movie to set back and lose yourself in. I know I'll have to check it out again because the jokes are so fast and furious that there's no way you can catch them all in one viewing. Be sure to check out Adam McKay's cameo as Dirty Mike, it's pretty good. Enjoy. End result is 3 1/2 out of 5. 

'Scott Pilgrim vs. The World'

Very rarely do you go into a movie with high expectations and not only are those expectations matched, but surpassed. 'Scott Pilgrim vs. The World' is such a film. This film if from the man who brought us 'Shaun of the Dead' and 'Hot Fuzz'. 'Scott Pilgrim' has it all. It's a mix of live action anime, superhero action, video game sequence, and romantic comedy. Edgar Wright gives us that brilliant comedy that he threw into his previous work and along with the thrilling special effects and elaborate fight scenes, provides non-stop ecitement for the entire film. I promise you that you have never seen a movie like this before. Since this movie set a new standard for cinema, I'm sure you will see tons of copy-cats in the next year try to repeat the success that I know this film will get. Kieran Culkin (aka Kevin's cousin Fuller from 'Home Alone') was one of the brightest spots of this film. You will find yourself begging to have him in every single scene. Wright pulled out all the stops when it came to the whole cast in general. Besides the always awesome Cera, we have Mary Elizabeth Winstead ('Live Free or Die Hard'), Aubrey Plaza ('Funny People'), Chris Evans, Ellen Wong aka Knives, and the always pleasant Jason Schwartzman. With all the films coming out that are getting the 3-D makeover, I was shocked that this film didn't take advantage of that third dimension. I've only seen 2 other films that matched the overall movie experience that 'Scott Pilgrim' gave me; 'Avatar' and 'Jurassic Park'. 'Scott Pilgrim' is my favorite movie of the year (sorry 'Inception') even though I know it won't win any Oscars. It's definitely a film that you need to experience in theaters. End result is a perfect 5 out of 5. My all-time #15 favorite movie. 

'O'

'O', a modern day Othello, brings Shakespeare's turbulent and tragic tale to the most unlikely of places; a prep boarding school. Directed by none other than Delmar from 'O Brother, Where Art Thou?', Tim Blake Nelson was able to present us with a story we all know and still have us on the edge of our seat wondering what the characters were going to do next. The film stars Mekhi Phifer, Josh Hartnett, Julia Stiles, and Rain Phoenix (yes Joaquin's sister). It was supposed to be released in 1999, but due to the films subject material and the horrific events of Columbine, the film was pushed back 2 years in an attempt to give people some time to grieve. Phifer (Othello/Odin) steals the show as the all-star that never thinks he's good enough in a world he doesn't think he belongs in. Josh Hartnett's portrayl of Iago, aka Hugo, is frightening. The way he becomes a puppet master and just sets all these little pawns into motion with no remorse or doubt in his mind about what he is trying to accomplish is almost Norman Bates like. I was very surprised how well this movie ultimately was and I am glad that directors are taking a chance in trying to bring 400 year old stories to the heads of production companines and reminding them that these are the greatest stories ever told. That men like Shakespeare are the reason that this art form exists and that his messages (though bleak and depressing) is the foundation for every movie or story or play that has ever been told since him. End result is a 3 out of 5. 

'Predators'

Robert Rodriquez presents (not directs) this 5th installment of the Predator franchise. This one, however, is the direct sequel of the original 'Predator' film starring Schwarzenegger, simply disregarding the other films. 'Predators' stars Adrian Brody, Alice Braga, Topher Grace, and Laurence Fishburne as some of the deadliest killers the world has to offer. They get summoned to a distant world where they become game for predators far worse than them. Other than a few casting flaws (Topher Grace being the biggest one), the director played all the right cards in bringing this thrill ride together. One thing in particular that helped bring a little reminiscence of Arnold's Predator killing days was the awesome soundtrack that backed up this film. I didn't know Brody could be such a badass either. He took control of this film from the very first scene (which was terrifying and jaw dropping all at the same time) and rode it all the way to the end. I was pretty sure the franchise was dead after their horrible attempt with 'AVP: Requiem', but Rodriquez put his faith in a relatively unknown director Nimrod Antal (his 2 previous outing were 'Vacancy' and 'Armored') and it really worked. This film feels like a mix between 'Predator' and 'Surviving the Game'. I think 'Predators' is a must see summer flick that is going to help reinvent the franchise and open the door for more exciting films to come. Final result is a 4 out of 5. My all-time #66 favorite movie.

'Fantastic Mr. Fox'

'Fantastic Mr. Fox' is another Wes Anderson classic. For any fan of his work, you need only to see a few moments of a film to notice his handy work. The only film I've seen that even comes close to Anderson's mastery is Rian Johnson's con caper 'The Brothers Bloom' which starred on of Anderson's own Adrien Brody. Anyway, 'Fox' is also Anderson's first crack at animation as well. He pulled out all of the stops to make this film have a powerhouse cast that included George Clooney, Meryl Streep, Jason Schwartzman, Bill Murray, and Willem Dafoe. His take on Roald Dahl's book is a mix between 'The Bearstein Bears' and 'Wallace and Gromit' with of course that infamous Anderson flare thrown in. Of all of Anderson's films, I'd say this is fourth best behind 'Life Aquatic', 'The Royal Tenenbaums' and 'Rushmore'. The best performance goes to Schwartzman who plays Ash, son to Mr. Fox himself (Clooney). He personifies this classic character that everyone loves to hate. I did wish I liked more of Schwartzman's work, but it seems like I only like his characters that Anderson envisions for him. Some people were upset that this film was rated PG and some of the content is not appropriate for younger audiences. I feel with the huge array of films that are out there right now, you should have more than enough of good and wholesome family fun to quench your thirst. Wes Anderson can do anything he wants to and you should thank him every single chance you get. Final result is a 4 1/2 out of 5.

'Grown Ups'

15 years after leaving a hugely popular late night comedy show, 5 friends get together to make a mediocre movie that is cliche around every corner. 'Grown Ups' brings together 4 (sorry James, Chris Farley is kind of dead and they needed another fat guy quick) of the best SNL cast members from the golden age of the show and pretty much let them do their own stuff for an hour and a half. It feels like this movie had no substance when it began, and all they really had written was how they got all these aging funny men together after 30 years. Beyond that, it seems like is was every man for himself. David Spade played the same character he's being playing ever since 'Just Shoot Me', Schneider just needed to pay his rent, I don't know what Chris Rock was thinking, Sandler got every funny bone in his body removed when he decided he wanted to focus on more family friendly films, and Kevin James was just filling a big void left by the greatest physical comedy actor ever. This movie certainly has funny parts in it, it's hard not to when you put some many heads together, something clever is bound to fall out of one of them. I was dissappointed in the lack of effort it seemed that was put into making this film. I continue to put faith into these actors in the hope that they can make me laugh like they used to, but the days of 'Happy Gilmore' and 'Tommy Boy' are gone and that era of comedy is done forever. I have no doubt that all of these men (Excluding Schneider. He's lucky KFC let him off long enough to make this movie) will continue to ride the wave that is Happy Madison Productions, but lucky for us there's a new tide coming in of fresh faces that will no doubt be the Farley's and Spade's and Sandler's of this generation. Final result is a measly 2 out of 5.

'XXX'

From the director of 'The Fast and the Furious' (with the "THE" intact) comes a modern and hip James Bond/Ethan Hunt spy movie starring none other than the Diesel himself. 'XXX' stars Diesel as Dom Toretto, oops, I mean Xander Cage, an extreme adrenaline junkie who's sort of a bad guy who ends up being the hero we can all root for in the end. Hang on, I'm confused. Diesel straps in and plays the same role that made him famous. Xander "X" Cage is a no-holds-bar X-Games, MTV, video game generation rebel who is always trying to bring down "The Man". And then one day, "The Man" comes knocking (a horribly scarred Samuel L. Jackson) and X decides to drop all his morals and convictions and suit up for the red, white, and blue. The action is awesome, don't get me wrong. Maybe a bit unbelievable, but that's Hollywood for you. I can get over that. I can over the fact that Samuel L. puts out what is arguably his worse performance ever. What I can't get over, are all the "extreme" and cheesy 1 liners that are thrown throughout this horribly written action flick. They're already making us watch Vin Diesel, who was outstanding in 'Saving Private Ryan' and I have to give him props in 'Pitch Black', but he's so drool and monotone in every other performance that it's like watching paint dry if paint was annoying and yelled its dialogue when it thought the scene called for a more serious tone. From a film standpoint, I would go as far to say that 'XXX' is definitely a spoof on the spy action movie and Cohen was over his head trying to deliver something special here. Final result is a 2 out of 5.

'The Immaculate Conception of Little Dizzle'

'The Immaculate Conception of Little Dizzle' is one of the most unique and unusual movies I have ever seen. I hate how in this so called "cookie cutter" world we live in, that if a film doesn't follow a certain amount of guidelines and expectations that the general public just steers clear of it. 'Dizzle' takes this outlook of media and turns it on its head by incorporating cookies as a vital part of the film, to the extreme as being one of the main characters and primary antagonist. You can tell that director David Russo has poured his heart and soul into telling us his convictions and beliefs in a fun and entertaining way. The story revolves around a young programmer (Marshall Allman) that is just trying to find his niche in life. He becomes so fed up with the way society has turned a deaf ear to people's actions and disconnection with the real world that he tries to remove himself from the equation. He quits his job and starts working as a janitor in a high rise office building, where he gets to meet the opposite end of the spectrum of society, the sort of hidden world around us. Vince Vieluf ('Grind') and Tania Raymonde ('Malcolm in the Middle') bring a raw and realistic aspect to the film that no big budget blockbuster could have done. The janitors stumble upon experimental cookies in the trash bins of one of the offices and naturally take it as a request to consume them. I love the symbolism there. Having these characters eat cookies out of the trash reflects the directors view of advertising and the hush hush world of product placement and consumer hypnosis. I also personally love how the main character experiments and shifts through all major religions in the film, trying to show us that he's the same person no matter what he believes or who he worships. This movie definitely takes some extreme turns and risks along the way, but in the end I think it pays off. If you want to step off the grid and see a film and concept that has been boiling and growing within someone for a long time, then bring your camera and get ready for 'The Immaculate Conception of Little Dizzle'. Final result is a well deserved 3 out of 5.